A Support Group of Insomniacs

Monster-Girl:


I hope you don't mind, & that you'll forgive me--but I'm hi-jacking your post.

You haven't written in a while, & we're starting to grow concerned. Ha--we're worried about you.

You've become quite infamous "Monster Girl". Torrent.

People all over the 'net are talking about these things you post. Everyone thinks you're just some nameless writer, trying to get published. Someone with an over-active imagination, with only her computer as a window into the world, trying to put the 'net to good use. Basically, they think you're only telling a story.

But I...we thought you should know, that there are others...many others, who believe you.

I haven't slept more than a week in months. That's why we've decided it best to try to contact you...the only way we know how. We've been talking to each other; that's why I've seen it fit to try posting on your site. Hope this works.

Your name is whispered in anxious circles...in the shadows of dark clubs, or under the bright fluorescent lights of all-nite diners...Nuthin but a hot cup of coffee & other insomniacs to keep us company.

Most of us are artists. Some are writers. Or musicians.

They write songs about you. & the things they see. & stories.

When I do sleep...I wake up with images I can't shake loose burned in the back of my retinas.

I wake up & I paint.

The paints take shapes that I don't give them alone...crumbling sandcastles, & wounded creatures I couldn't even imagine....images reflected in shards...images that stay with me. Echoes of my dreams.

I've been painting a whole series...they feature a winged man, with bandages 'round his eyes. He scares me, but it feels better to get him out of my head. Banish him to the canvas. I don't only dream of him though. It's not him who speaks to me...

I find myself compelled to take photographs of long abandoned places, buildings crumbling to dust. Places that have been still for too long. They hold secrets within their walls; I can feel them. I climb inside the wreckage, & see things...scuttling in the shadows. Graffitti that seems to have deep meanings hidden within....

There are too many of us now to name. You're infecting us like a virus. Some are terrified, some think a muse is speaking to them...fueling their "art." Some just want to sleep.

To sleep without these dreams.

I'm not sure what to think, but I don't think it's coincidental that most of the afflicted are "artists". We're more...in sync maybe? Open? Crazy?

Anyways--some of us, myself included...we think you're unwittingly gathering us. Amassing an army sympathetic to you.

& I don't think you're dead either. Or we'd have felt it.

So, we thought you should know, that we're here...& growing with each passing night.


~The Sleepless

Hope Springs Eternal

I cradle his head in my arms, like a child, until he stirs.

We just sit there, he & I, in this dark cavern, our quest at a standstill.

My blood has dried to a darkened rust color across his forehead. The boy blinks his dark eyes open, trying to find his bearings. Looking up at me, but not taking it all in...

-"Why?" he asks me. "You were gonna leave me before...you didn't even wanna help me...."

I look down at him, & pull him in a little closer to me.

-"Why are you fighting for me now? When it would be easier to leave me? When you see such horrible things...about me?..."

-"Because it's worth it." I tell him...ever so softly.

-"But why? I know what you saw...I see things too. HE shows me things. I'm gonna hurt you..."

-"No." I smile down at him. "You're not. HE wants you to believe that...he's trying to twist you. Twist you to his will. & that will be so much simpler if you've been broken first. HE wants to break your spirit....But I'm not going to let that happen."

-"But why not?" Tony is nothing if not persistant, even in a wounded & weary state, as he was.

-"Because you give me hope. & you've woken the magick inside me, once again. & there's magick in you, too...."

I leaned down to kiss his forehead, & then stumbled to my feet, hauling Tony with me.

-"Now c'mon--enough questions. There'll be plenty time for that on the way..."

-"On the way where?" Tony asked me.

-"We're crossing the Liar's Bridge...& we've already lost too much time..."

A Daring Little Soul

So--you think you've gotten the better of me, Dream Weaver?

You, of all, should know things are never that simple...

A little spell, & you cast me out...but it won't hold.

There's always another way in--& you will not deny me what is already mine.

Words & a little spilt blood does not change the truth.

Dig in deeper Dream Weaver--look deep inside his soul. & deeper into yours.

Defying me will cost you greatly--& it will not be a price you wish to pay.

The boy is corrupted--I stole his free will long ago.

You see glimpses of what he once was, fighting to break free.

But soon enough, that light will fade--& all that will be left is the darkness.

& the blood...It will engulf him. & rest assured, it will swallow you too.

You dare to hope. To have faith & resist.

This will only cause you more pain in the end.

Give the boy to me--or die trying to protect him.

You both have the potential to be great--pulsing through your veins. Rulers & Warriors--by our own right.

Or, your visions can become a reality...& when you finally lay eyes upon the Red Gates you fear so much--it will be when I stretch you across them.

& if you wish to be daring Dream Weaver--I offer a little challenge.

Look in the mirror. Gaze into your own eyes...& tell me what you see....

I Dare You.

Doorways

I make my decision. I loosen my grip on the boy's throat.

Just as I do this, the bottom falls out...Literally.

Several portals shimmer into being all around us; I can see myself, in various different realities, as though peering through a distorted mirror. It's unnerving.

I'm not doing this. Can it be him? Tony? How the hell is he doing this?

Another portal opens it's mouth beneath us, & before I have time to think, we're falling through.

I shift forms, into that of a large hawk, & dig my talons into the boy's shoulders, in effort to ease us through the gap...I don't want to lose him.

Tony lets out a yelp, but still I hold tightly. I flap my wings frantically, trying to cushion the fall. But still we plummet.

I feel like I'm watching different realities, different "whens", flashing before me. I see myself, as I may have been had I been merely human. My human form sits in an office, punching keys, with lifeless grey eyes.

But we're still falling--& she's gone.

I see Tony....He's wearing a crown of sorts, fashioned from bent, twisted scrap metal. He sits upon a throne of discarded junk...creatures of all sorts kneeling at his feet. Gabriel is among them...The albino gargoyle has never bent his knee to anyone....but there he is, face in the dirt with all the others, swearing fealty to the boy...this King of the Broken Things?...

Still falling...Gone.

Justin has gathered the Winged Ones...They fly in formation, as though preparing for battle. Most of them grip reflective daggers...no, shards of mirrors? They grip broken mirrors in hands & talons...They fly with such ferocity...

I want to join them....but blink--& they're gone.

I see the Red Gates, & a figure chained across them. Look a little closer, & I see that the figure is me. My arms are outstretched...Why can't I shift? Why can't I shake them loose...I squint to catch a closer look...silver. Chains fashioned of pure silver encircle my wrists & ankles...They stretch me taught across the iron gates....My back is bare...blood running down in streaks...not healing...

The Bandaged Man approaches me, a whip with a silver tipped end grasped loosely at his side...

Gone.

The ground doesn't fall away this time. I release Tony as gently as possible; he hits the ground in a cloud of dust. I shift to human form, & land lightly on my feet.

The air is acrid...I smell something burning, just 'round the bend. Flickering orange light, dancing like fireflies...

Tony sits in the dirt, gasping. I haul him to his feet, slamming him against a tree.

-"What the fuck is going on with you?!" I shriek at him.

-"Get him out!" He's screaming at me. "Get him out--get him out of me! Please!"

Tears stream down his face, & his eyes go black again. Black chasms of death...His voice is gravelly once more.

-"Mine." & his hands wrap 'round my throat this time. Squeezing. The air is tight. Adrenaline races through my veins...it's overpowing. I heave the boy forward, slamming him with inhuman force against the tree trunk. He connects with a painful cracking sound. He crumples at the base of the massive tree.

I run to him, straddling him, & slam his head against the ground. His eyes are empty...out like lights.

Good--buys me a few minutes. I pull a silver blade from a sheath in my boot, careful of the edge. Silver has much power here.

I take Tony's left hand in mine, & dig in with the blade. I make fast work carving the rune of protection..."algiz". It resembles the english letter "Y"...with the middle extended. All the while I'm muttering--"I cast you out. I cast you out. He's mine--I cast you out." He never flinches; he never moves. His eyes remain empty.

I put the blade to the boy's right palm, & hastily carve the symbol once again.

I then run the sharp edge along my own palm, blood welling up...angry & red. Fierce.

Using my own blood, I paint the protective rune across Tony's forehead.

-"I cast you out. This boy is mine--& he's under my protection."

The light behind Tony's eyes returns--he throws his head back in a scream....

A guttural, primal scream. Feral.

He has an inner glow, as though he himself, is burning. The boy begins to blur around the edges, as though it's taking everything within him to hold himself together. He might just...fly apart...like burnt paper. Nothing left but ashes.

But he's strong. This boy is a survivor.

A raspy scream seems to twine with his...two voices. A blackness crawls from his throat...building & twisting...a writhing, living darkness pouring from within. It swirls around him, his own private funnel cloud...thrashing & fighting...before finally dissipating...

The boy can barely stand, his eyes are so weary. He looks at the jagged symbols carved into his ragged hands.

-"I belong to you now. Thank you."

He falls backwards....& I catch him.

Teeth Around the Jugular...

"...& I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying, Come & see. & I saw...

& behold, a white horse...."

With my teeth wrapped around the boy's throat, a few things crossed my mind. The first, of course, was the simplest solution. End him. I didn't need to invade Justin's mind to know that's what he was thinking. "If the boy's hands can be forced--end him. He's a threat to all of us."

I could feel his pulse fluttering like a frantic bird against my tongue. So tempting to the beast inside me. Just clench a little tighter. & his blood would be so sweet. Salty & bitter sweet.

This blackness in the boy's eyes unnerved me. Dark chasms of death. I could see my own Death in those eyes. It was not a good death. It is not yet my time. I've much to do...

End it.

But I also saw a frightened child, trapped within the darkness. Caged within those eyes.

Could I save him? Should I even try?

So many lives are at stake--not only my own.

But what of eyes that smile? What of friendship? What of trust? Or faith?

Tony--my friend--trusts me. Believes in me. When so few do.

What is that worth?

So many questions...flickering like a candle flame. Dancing behind soft eyes...

& it all comes down to one thing right now, at this moment....

Bite down? Or release...?

All eyes are on me....


"...& I heard a voice...in the midst of the four beasts. & I looked, & behold. A pale horse.

& the name, it said on him--was Death. & Hell followed with him..."

A Force of the Hand

So, once again, I was alone in my own mind. I just sat there in the dirt, trembling, trying to regain my composure. My companions simply stared at me, unsure what to do with themselves.

Tony was crumpled at my feet, tears streaming down his cheeks. Bits of dirt clung to his face & hands where his skin was sticky with blood & tears. He wept, like a small child, awakened from a nightmare.

I crawled over to him; I meant simply to comfort him. To calm him.

Fingers outstretched, I reached for him.

Abruptly, his tears stopped. His mannerisms shifted.

He became...still. Cold. The weeping child was lost, & I no longer recognized this person beside me.

In a blur of motion, he was atop me, a jagged stone clenched in his fist. Tony brought the rock down swiftly, connecting with my temple. He hit me with such force that my vision swam.

I kicked him off of me, & instinctively shifted forms. I traded human skin for black fur & sharp teeth.

In my canine form, I had my teeth around his jugular before he could come at me again.

His eyes were black as night, not like anything I'd seen before.

This was not Tony. Fuck, what the hell am I dealing with here?

The boy squirmed beneath me, & I clenched down, just a little. Just enough to puncture his skin...little droplets of salty sweet blood on my tongue.

The others closed in; I growled to keep them at bay. Justin & Gabriel backed off, just a little bit.

Tony's eyes faded back to their natural shade. "Torrent?" his voice came out a strained gurgle. "What are you doing?...."

I didn't loosen my grip, just released another threatening growl...warning the others to keep their distance.

I'd handle this.

Someone is fucking toying with us...three guesses as to who it is. The first two don't count...

"Make Me Not See Anymore..."

"Make me not see anymore." That's what Tony said to me, as he held his ragged, bloody hands out to me. "Make me not see anymore."

I took his hands in mine; his blood was warm & sticky. "It's gonna be alright..." That's what I told him, though I'm not sure if I believed it then, or even now. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you. Not if I can help it."

All eyes were on me.

I opened the link between us. I wasn't sure I wanted to, but I did it anyways.

"It's okay. This might hurt a little. Show me. Let me see."

The boy lacks control, & the images flooded my perceptions in a deluge of pain & death.

Monsters falling at the hands of humans. Some I knew. Some I did not.

I watched as Justin's wings were carved from his body, with a jagged shard of glass. No, it was a mirror. A shard of a broken mirror, speckled with flecks of blood; meaty reflections dancing across it's surface. I heard familiar screams...guttural, hopeless shrieks of agony.

Justin's wings were tossed aside in the dust...discarded. Shredded leather. Tattered & torn.

I tried to focus on the bloody hands responsible, the ones that grasped the shard of the mirror so tightly that his own blood mingled with that of his victim.

I foisted my will upon the vision--forcing it's direction. Forcing it upwards, towards the assailant's face.

Tony. Splattered in blood & gore. Smiling. Laughing. But the laughter--it wasn't his voice.

The vision shifted...wisked me to a place of desolation & rubble. Fallen, crumbled buildings. Dust & ash. & Tony stood in the midst of it all. My fallen brethren at his feet. & a jagged, bloody, reflective shard in each hand.

He raised them up & rushed at me, plunging them into my chest, & I heard my own voice screaming...the blood gurgling up in my throat.

Stars above--I could taste it.

I abruptly yanked myself back, away from Tony's mind & back into my own.

I pulled so hard, I fell unceremoniously on my ass in the dirt.

Justin grabbed my hand, to haul me to my feet. "No--don't touch me!" I screamed. "Don't touch me!"

I was free of Tony's mind--but still in the grasp of a vision. A vision of blackness.

Bloody bandages waved before my eyes. Dancing in the wind. Accompanied by a gravelly whisper...

"He was mine before you ever found him. Your hope is futile Dream Weaver. But I assure you, it tastes good...."

This was followed by a bellowing laughter. I forced my will out toward the force grasping at me...pulled it in tight, let it well up, & then released. A flash of brightness. White. & I felt the grasp loosen & give.

Until I was alone in my own head once again.